Relationships
This refer to the bonds that we form with other humans during our lifetime. Some are short lived and many continue for the entire course of out lives. It includes:
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Family relationships
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Friends and Acquaintances
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Admired but unrequited interactions
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Romance, love, companionship and marriage
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Transient amorous engagements
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Adversarial or Antagonistic interrelations (Enemies)
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Transactional relationships with neighbours, sales -people, work associates, co-worshippers, and similar others
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The relationships we form deeply affect our physical, social and mental wellbeing. Many relationships are bestowed upon us by way of birth and upbringing. As we age, however, we choose the individuals with whom we share our lives, homes and personal spaces. Many of our formed relationships will be to our benefit and sadly, some will be to our detriment. Nevertheless, when one becomes afraid in a relationship, one must never be afraid to suspend it.
Background
Humans are social animals that thrive in the knowledge of being accepted as part of a community. Interpersonal relationships, as they develop, prioritise personal benefits that promote individual survivability and wellbeing. From the first day of life when an infant yearns for the soft comfort of a teat, the human's dependency on others had begun. Relationships create easier routes to manage:
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The sourcing of food and comfort that are essential for survival
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The desire for love, sex, companionship and marriage
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The expression of our intellectuality and the appreciation of arts
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Our collective curiosity on the matter of human existence and the inevitability of death
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Modes of association between individuals vary. The intensity of the relationship often determines its impact on the wellbeing, especially if it were to be terminated. Relationship intensity may be:
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Loose
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Occasional contacts
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Superficial interactions
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Moderate
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Numerous contacts or
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Significant interactions
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High
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Innumerable contacts or
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Profound interactions
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Pathological
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Dysfunctional interactions
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Abusive
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Unhealthy inequity
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Dominating
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Skewed power base
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Narcissistic tilt
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Bad for wellbeing
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Healthy Relationships
There are no perfect relationships. Fortunately, relationships do not have to be perfect in order to be healthy. Indeed, those who seek a perfect one will never find a healthy one. Healthy relationships should include these in their discussions:
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The pace of the relationship: forming, maintaining, sustaining or terminating as the need may be
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Trust and Honesty as expected from each party
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Mutual respect amongst partners
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Respect and Equity
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Kindness & Fairness
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Independence of thoughts
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Conflict resolution
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The need to have dedicated time for fun
Pearls to Note:
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If it is destroying you, consider getting out or suspending the relationship
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Seek advice early
Impact on General Wellbeing
A pathological relationship is destructive to wellbeing. Well managed relationships are however essential to psycho-social stability. Even when carefully managed, some relationships may still be detrimental to the individual, either instantly or with a delayed effect.
Physical
Draining
Stressful
Healthy
Boosting
Mental
Draining
Stressful
Healthy
Boosting
Draining
Stressful
Lifestyle
Healthy
Boosting
Caution
Great relationships can quite easily turn sour. The fine line between affection and disgust, love and hate, is easily and too often trampled upon.
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These are signs and indications of an unhealthy relationship
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High Intensity
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Manipulative
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Violence
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Abuse: Ongoing abuse of any form
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Betrayal: the feeling of betrayal by one or more partner
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The balance between self-sufficiency and Narcissism can sometimes be blurred and indistinguishable to some people. Narcissism (self-absorbed behaviour) on the part of one partner is unhealthy for relationships
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The balance between the 'need to belong' and Vulnerability is another delicate one that is too easily crossed
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Potential for disappointment is great when reliance upon another individual is high
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Note that Abuse will usually come through a 'trusted' relationship: do not ignore. Report!
Benefits
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Wellbeing of the individuals
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Companionship
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Procreation
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Comfort
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Convenience
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Support:
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Physical
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Social
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Emotional
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Applicable Remedies >
Further Reading